Spine Painting
Your imbalances function. Your spirit is bright. Your back story is behind you, and you’ve decided to stop looking in the mirror to see if your curve is fatter or skinnier today.
But still, there is healing to come…
One day, a painted spine passes before me on a scroll through Instagram.
Vines and flowers, life and beauty, growing out of painted ribs and a spinal fusion scar. A beautiful dancer holds them in her softness. “Yes!” I say to myself. “THIS. This energy, this beauty, this embrace.”
I follow the trail of the vines. The spine belongs to @bionic_ballerina, a.k.a. Meredith Montana, painted by her best friend artist Devyn, @thepeanutgalleryart. I watch her story unfold over the months.
Meredith announces BioniCon, the conference for adults living with scoliosis and spinal fusion. I see spine painting on the agenda. I learn that unfused scolis are welcome. I send in my registration fee and spend days scouring Amazon for the backless shirt that will perfectly frame my virgin canvas.
Two months later…Saturday afternoon at the conference…I move up the spine painting line. The skin feels the brush of air. Exposed. My back never goes on display. I rarely even peek my shoulders out. I take my place on Devyn’s stool.
Vines trail out of her paintbrush. Fellow paintees, their fusion scars newly adorned, circle around. I notice how balanced and strong their backs look. They, in turn, narrate my beautiful spine coming to life. When my life-spine-vine is done, conference companion Rachael looks me in the eye. She tells me she is proud of me for finding the courage to offer my back back to myself.
My eyes mist. My heart drops ten pounds of amour. Healing stitches all my parts closer together at the center.
Some day, all the tension will be dissolved. But I will not wait for that day. I will do today everything I know to do to step toward the beauty that is this body, these imbalances, this scoliosis. I journey with community. I see the others shed cloaks of hiding and lift their spines, their scars, their braces up to the light. I know I, too, am dissolving the ancient baggage packed away long before I knew to be wary of such misdirection.
The story behind you has brought you here, with all its preciousness. Here’s to a million painted spines, every curve turned toward life, every scar offered as sacred, all of us stepping forward with courage to greet what abandoned out of fear. We move closer to ourselves than we knew was possible and see straight into the truth that this curvy journey has been given in absolute love.
Theresa Shay is the founding director of TriYoga of Central Pennsylvania, where she teaches weekly yoga and meditation online and trains others to teach TriYoga®. Each week, she shares wisdom cultivated from decades of TriYoga study and practice.
Learn more about her here. Theresa can be reached at Theresa@PennsylvaniaYoga.com. Find her on Instagram @theresa_of_triyoga for more inspiration and light.